What. A. Week.

In a good way. Seriously, a good way. I think. This time last week I was in Cornwall with my band friends. It was absolutely fantastic. Sun, sea, and my alternate family. I couldn't have finished my second year of university any better. Well, I could have passed, but hey. That's being sorted. Will soon…

Failure. Complete failure.

I wrote a post at the beginning of this academic year. It was about how awful my first year had been, and how I was so determined to work and do what I do best. I have finished my 2nd year, and I've failed. I'm not being melodramatic there, I've actually failed. One of my…

You are loved. Always.

So things have gone up. The concert happened. I wasn't in it. Managed with that surprisingly well. Out with band right now, been told a post is probably not a good idea, as I'm more than a little drunk. Oh well. Yeah, alcohol. I like alcohol. Sorry if this is incoherent, I'll most likely delete…

For the nonce, I am lost.

Earlier this week I had some severe doubts about a concert that I'm playing in tomorrow. I was told how members of the band were tired of me, and also how I was still wanted as a player. Yeah. I'm a music student who can't perform. We had our last rehearsal today and I started…

I am broken. Damaged.

Don't get me wrong; I have the most wonderful set of friends. I love them all, and they are so fantastic and supportive, I don't know what I'd have done without them. I wanted to day that first. I feel that what is going to follow may seem like a contradiction, but I'm pretty certain…

Would you look at that. A thing.

I've cracked a rib. Again. Not in a kayak this time though, which is an improvement. I've had a tough week again. Nothing too horrific has happened, but as anyone should know depression strikes when it pleases. I've had panic attacks, moments of complete hopelessness and I just haven't been me. Not needed. I also…