The sertraline is causing havoc again. I had a time of feeling nothing, now I’m all over the place. I’m nervous, ecstatic, depressed, giddy. It’s horrible.
At the minute, pretty down. I don’t know why, today had, by many accounts been a good day. Lecture, shopping, swimming, rehearsal. A good, normal day. Well, collapsed on my trombone in rehearsal, but my favourite security responded, and he always makes me feel better. Trombone was fine as well (thank you God…). But I was feeling down before, and I don’t know why. I’ll have a couple of hours in the gym tomorrow, see if that’ll help. Also have a kayaking session, perhaps one without injury/near death!
I know of one thing that hasn’t helped. My old flat went to the pub tonight, and I went to join them after I’d recovered from rehearsal. I sent a text to some of them, and one replied saying that yes they were still there, so I said I was coming and got back ‘ok, see you shortly’. Walked there and they’d gone. Definitely in the right place. I checked. So I wandered around a little bit, then gave up and came home. My housemate had been in for 40 minutes. They would have left 5 minutes before I arrived. Nobody said anything, the person I texted didn’t even mention I was coming. So yeah. Feel a little unwanted at the minute.
Sigh. Life. Why.